I was not on the soggy lawn, talking with Farmer Bob or Harmless Todd, gnawing on cob, or watching the dogs, donkeys, hogs, and other livestock squawking or hee-hawing in the lofts or stalls and gobbling or hobbling or pawing since dawn. I was not at the mall with Roger the Jock, or father, or Don the doddering father's father, walking along at a crawl with the mob that bothers to shop and stop and shop and stop, as the snobs mock all and flaunt what they just bought--and I hope they rot. I was not at the Mossy Nissan garage, dropping my jaws at the cars that I saw or coughing at smoggy mirages of Dodges or wanting to jog through the wash. I was not at the dock taking stock of the rocks or the yachts on the calm, calm water, where the palms have got the posture of doddering Don at foggy dawns or balmy ones, and smelling the cod, the prawn, and the carp. I was not at the mausoleums, which are barred by guards and smart doctors with prognostications and carts, its marbled halls filled with groveling sobs and drawling psalms, cross with want and raw with shock, fraught with qualms and embalmed bodies. I was not at the lodge built with logs from the pond, guzzling egg-nog or soda-pop with Rob or John, all of us awed by the watery falls, hearing the calls of the
burrahhping frogs--they
grok like the man from Mars. I was not at the Taj Mahal, enthralled by its marvelous vaulty halls and yawning walls, and nauseated by the all the shops selling China dolls, lozenges, shawls, goggles, and pogs. I was not at the bar, or at the bop-bopping vaudeville, or at work being partly taught DOS by the boss. I was not at charming Narnia, or at hot and haunting Montezuma, or lost at Oz while I sought my aunt. I was not bombing 'Nam, or stopping and mopping the cockroaches, or tossing the greens while I pause to stir the sauce in the pot. I was not with Pocahantes the squaw, or Fonz, or Gonzo, or locked up like a hawk or a fraud with gaunt Hans. I was caught up, distraught as I thought and I fought to use what was taught; I was here--
Writing this poem.
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April Martinez
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